What's Actually Normal (And What's Not)

You guys. I HATE getting my period. 

When I started my infertility journey in 2019, that stupid period was a traumatic reminder that I was, in fact, not pregnant… again and again.

We are SO happy with our decision of having one child (who is now 11!) but I still hated getting my period.

So, I took oral birth control and skipped the placebo week for years so I didn’t need to worry about it (note: ask your doctor about this if you hate getting your period, have PMDD, etc.).

My Peri Journey Today

Over a year after perimenopause hit me sideways, (Yes, I had severe symptoms even though I was on birth control), I finally decided to stop birth control, and move the menopausal hormone therapy (estrogen patch + progesteron pill). Let me tell you, I feel WONDERFUL.

BUT.

I got my periods back. And I hate them. Really, really. Period chaos during perimenopause is a common topic of uncertainty. A common question I get asked from women in their late 30s and early 40s: "My periods have changed. Is this normal?" Followed closely by: "Should I be worried?" And then, usually: "My doctor didn't seem concerned but something feels off."

Your instinct that something has shifted is not wrong. Your cycle IS changing. It's supposed to. That doesn't mean everything you're experiencing is fine, but it does mean you're not imagining it. 

So let's break down what's happening, what's expected, and what actually deserves a phone call to your doctor.

The Biology Bit - Dr. Flora's Notes:

Picture it. You've had a predictable 28-day cycle for 20 years. Then one month it's 24 days. Then it's 32. Then you skip a month entirely. Sometimes it’s light. Sometimes you feel you’re a teen again with heavy bleeding. You thought you were over this chaos because you are in your 40s? 

“Watch this.” says your peri body.

Here's what's happening. In perimenopause, your ovaries start releasing eggs less predictably. Some months you ovulate, some months you don't. When you don't ovulate, you don't make progesterone that cycle, and estrogen keeps building the uterine lining unopposed. So when a period finally comes, it can be heavier, longer, or come after a longer gap. Other times, cycles shorten because you're ovulating earlier than usual. It's chaos. It’s physiology. 

IMPORTANT: Just because your periods are wackadoodle during perimenopause doesn’t mean you CANNOT GET PREGNANT. If having more children is not in your life plan, please speak to your physician regarding contraceptive methods best for you.

This Week's Reset

One small thing I want you to do this week:

Start tracking your cycle in a real way, even if it looks nothing like it used to.

The habit: Pick one tracking method (a paper calendar, a period app, notes in your phone, whatever you'll actually use) and log three things every day: whether you're bleeding (and how heavy), your energy level (1-10), and one dominant symptom (bloating, mood, cramps, headache, sleep issue, whatever's loudest). 

Do this for the next 90 days. 

When cycles are unpredictable, patterns emerge only when you have data. And when you eventually do talk to your doctor, you'll walk in with real information instead of "I don't know, it's been weird."

While you're tracking, watch for these things that actually warrant a doctor's visit: bleeding through a super pad or tampon every hour for several hours in a row, cycles consistently shorter than 21 days, bleeding that lasts more than 7 days, bleeding between periods, or bleeding after sex. Those aren't "just peri." Those need a workup.

Hit reply and tell me the weirdest thing your cycle has done lately. I promise nothing you say will surprise me.

Ready to Get Yourself Back? 

If your cycle changes have you spiraling, my free Perimenopause Pattern Check helps you figure out which of the peri patterns you're actually in. If you took it a few weeks ago, your results are still there. If not, now's a good time.

Take the free assessment HERE.

P.S. Next week I'm getting into the one that makes women the most frustrated of all: why "just eat less, move more" stopped working. Bring your patience, we're going somewhere with it.